Saturday, July 28, 2012

Deliverance

Dear God:

Father, right now i am in desperate need for You to hear me and move in my life.  i need a shot of joy.  well...honestly, a shot of anything! anything that will break the wall of indifference forming in my heart.   i think my face is beginning to set into a permanent frown..."restore to me the joy of your salvation" (psalm 51:12).  when i pray i feel like You are distant.  and my words fail me...and because i don't have any words, i will use Yours...

Be pleased, O LORD, to deliver me! O LORD, make haste to help me! (psalm 40:13) Why have you forgotten me? Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?(Psalm 42:9) Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God, for I shall again praise him Psalm 42:11).  Send out your light and your truth: let them lead me; let them bring me to your holy hill and to your dwelling! Then I will go to the altar of God, to God my exceeding joy (Psalm 43:2-4).

Give ear to my prayer, O God, and hide not yourself from my plea for mercy! Attend to me, and answer me; I am restless in my complaint and I moan, because of the noise of the enemy (Psalm 55:1-3).

But I call to God, and the LORD will save me.  Evening and morning and at noon I utter my complaint and moan, and he hears my voice.  He redeems my soul in safety from the battle that i wage...(Psalm 55:16-18).


I will trust in you (Psalm 55:23).

father, hear my prayer.  because words fail me, i used Your words.  i hold onto the hope and knowledge that You will hear my cries and answer them.  but please don't wait too long.  break this heart of stone.  soften it...make me smile.  let me shake off this shell of indifference.  let me have a heart that is molded after yours.  give me a child-like and joyful heart once again.

love,
grace


Sunday, July 22, 2012

Passion

Dear God:

today i laughed like i haven't laughed in the last few weeks.  even if it because of something really awkward... =] (haha...still funny) father, help me to break the crust of indifference that has encased my heart.  i want to be passionate again.  passionate about what? hmm...passionate about You and passionate about loving others.  father, this year has been a challenge.  i feel like i trip and fall at every obstacle and test.  at the same time,  i feel like i am growing little by little.  even through all the hardships i've been through, i can see how You have been guiding me all along.  thank you for holding my hand through everything.  

father, every second of every minute may i fall more in love with You.  i want my life to be an epic love story between the Creator and His beloved daughter.  help me discover new things about You each day.  refresh our relationship.  revive my heart.  move me to tears.  

Lord, let my heart become soft again.  i feel like i've let it harden recently and i absolutely hate it.  help me, Lord! help me break down walls.  help me destroy chains.  fill my heart with Your love and compassion.  i don't want to live this life for myself.  may i once again come before Your throne on my knees in worship and adoration.  may i once again approach You in tears to intercede on the behalf of others.  

father, i love You and i worship You now.

love,
grace

Saturday, July 14, 2012

Wisdom

Dear God:

"But God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world...to bring to nothing things that are" (1 Corinthians 1:27-28)

"For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.  And I was with you in weakness and in fear and much trembling, and my speech and my message were not in plausible words of wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power" (1 Corinthians 2:2-4)

Father i know nothing.  there's times when i feel like i know everything.  but in reality, my wisdom, my words fall short when compared to so many people i know.  father, that fact frustrates and discourages me.  i feel like i'm the weakest and dumbest person of everyone i know.  when i speak about You, the words stumble out of my mouth and sometimes i don't know if it even makes sense.  i just speak in faith believing that You will step in and work.  

Holy Spirit, thank you.  thank you for choosing the weak and the lowest of people to do Your work.  please let me continue to know nothing...i know that sounds weird...haha.  but i want to know nothing myself, so i will learn to only rely on You for wisdom and power.  because there's so many times when i help people and i feel like i did a great job...as if i am so great and did everything by myself.  i don't want to act like i know what to say.  i don't want to act like i am great.  instead, i want to constantly  humble myself before You and others.  i want my heart to be emptied of what i think i know, so You can fill it with what You know.  

God, i love You.  continue to work in me.  continue to change me.  i want to walk with Your authority.  i want to walk with the authority of a daughter of the Creator of the universe.  i want to speak with Your authority--speak with the wisdom of the Holy Spirit.  i want my words to have Your power.  i will keep pursuing You and i am comforted knowing that You are pursuing me too.

love,
grace



Friday, July 13, 2012

Foundations

Dear God:

I want to be Unmovable
and Unshakeable 
so let my roots grow down deep

Unmovable
and Unshakeable in You


father i fail time and time and time (x 100) again.  sometimes i feel like i can't do anything right.  i feel like the foolish man who built his house on the sand--whenever storms, hardships, struggles come i just fall flat on my face.  my foundation is weak...it's cracked and moldy.  God, i want a foundation that is Unmovable and Unshakeable.  come in and completely rebuild, restructure my spiritual foundation.  i know it won't be easy, but father, i need to stop falling...i want to start running as fast and as passionately as i can towards You. 

God, the way i am, i can't help anyone else but myself.  but Lord! Lord, i'm tired of focusing on myself.  i'm tired.  i want a solid foundation made of rock.  a foundation built upon Your Word.  father, i want an unmovable foundation so that i can serve You.  i want to love others like You love them.  i want my heart to break for others as Yours breaks for them.  but father, to do that...i need...i want a foundation that can't be shaken.  i want a solid foundation that You can build on, and that others can stand on to get closer to You.  let others be able to stand on me to see You more clearly.  

love,
grace